Monday 9 November 2009

How To Know He Really Loves You

1.) You are lying there, feeling fat from your recent surgery, no makeup, hair plastered to your head, trying not to sweat to death in the mugginess when out of nowhere he starts looking at you. You ask “What?” and he says “Nothing, I was just picturing you lying naked on a bed of rose petals.”

2.) He drops you off at work and you point out your “stalker” (the guy who comes in and hangs out for hours while you are trying to get your work done and who came into work everyday while you were out sick trying to find out if you were coming back anytime soon.) on the sly. When your man kisses you goodbye the “stalker” goes out and sits in his car but doesn’t leave. Your man’s hackles go up and he jots down the guys license plate number before he leaves. He then calls you from home an hour or so later and when you tell him the guy is still sitting in his car out front, tells you to tell one of the police officers when they come in. Then at 3am calls again to find out if you are still okay.

3.) He brags to near strangers that you could out-fry the Colonel when it comes to chicken, that your chocolate chip cookies are to die for and that nobody does fish fry better than you… hands down.

4.) You forget to put your new partials in before you run to the store and when you mention it halfway there says “Never mind, you look gorgeous anyway.”

5.) You mention the tortilla chips your are nibbling in bed while watching a movie would taste better with some chili and melted cheese. He hops up throws on his shoes and runs to the store for chili and mozzarella cheese.

6.) It’s 2 am and all you can think about is how nice a 7up would taste. Theres a blizzard going on but he crawls out of bed and drives 3 miles to the nearest open store and buys you the biggest 7up he can get.

7.) The taco bell close to your house is closed and you dont want burgers so he drives across town so you can have a taco salad at 10pm.

8.) You saw a guy using fish bells and mention that that would be fun to do to a couple of the poles. He shows up with fish bells for the next fishing trip.

9.) You usually get mosquito bit all over your butt (literally) everytime you go fishing. So the next time you go out fishing he brings bug dope and practically soaks your butt in it. Or he brings a thick blanket to cover your lawn chair so they wont bite you.

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